Chapter 95: It Never Existed
I was interrupted from my thoughts, then Zhang Yu was the one who took the wine inside that cup and poured it back into the bottle. I realized that that bottle was still empty.
I frowned as I looked at that empty bottle, but Zhang Ye shook the bottle and said, "Actually, this is a kind of magical glass, it looks like there is nothing on the outside, but there is actually a small layer of film inside."
I nodded thoughtfully and said, "Can I have a glass of your new wine?"
Zhang Yu poured a glass of white liquor out, inside the same glass from earlier. Then pushed it to me.
I picked up the cup and put it to my lips, but for some reason, I could never get the wine into my lips.
Zhang Yu said, "You can't drink my wine right now."
I said, "Why." While saying this, I slammed the cup to my mouth, but it was as if there was another force in my hand, pulling on my hand and not letting me put it down. At the same time, it was as if my lips were sealed, how could I not open them.
Zhang Yu said, "People who drink are sad or have dissatisfaction in their hearts."
I nodded thoughtfully, controlling the power in my hands but it disappeared. Instead of choosing to drink, I put the cup down.
Zhang Yu said, "When you want to drink, come back to me."
Chen Yanlu quickly returned with a lunchbox in his hand, and he looked at Zhang Yang with a strange gaze. Before I could tell the difference, I was pulled back into the middle of the room by Chen Yanlu.
After eating, I went to take a shower. The water from the shower hit my forehead, the ends of my hair, and slid down my cheeks and collarbones.
The scalding water made me feel slightly more real.
When I wrapped my towel around me and got under the covers, Chen Yanlu hugged me tightly, her body rolling like a piece of charcoal.
After the flames burned, I gasped and hugged Chen Yanlu's waist, then fell into a deep sleep.
Life seemed to be fixed on this, and although Zhang Yu hadn't been here for a long time, she was completely integrated into our lives.
Xia Bing moved to my place and lived in the room next to Zhang Yu.
In the blink of an eye, three months passed.
Finally, it came to the wedding of Chen Yanlu and me.
The white wedding dress looked like a dream.
The carpet under my feet, incomparably soft, I stepped on high heels, walking cautiously every step.
Chen Yanlu's wide palm, holding my hand, the two of us walked to the front of the witness.
The witness smiled as he looked at me and Chen Yanlu, and then solemnly began the ancient and sacred, but not at all tiresome, set of inquiries on top of the wedding.
"Mr. Chen Yanlu, will you take Miss Homi as your wife. From now on, whether she is sick or healthy, you will love and care for her well, and stay by her side for the rest of your life."
Chen Yen Lu nodded, looked at me tenderly, and said, "I am willing."
Through the faint white gauze, in the corner of Chen Yanyulu's eyes, there seemed to be a trace of crystal. A strange feeling suddenly rose in my heart.
The witness continued, "Ms. Homi ……"
I turned my head violently and looked at the dense crowd under the stage, they were all smiling and looking at me and Chen Yanlu, then whispering.
Those were all the friends of Chen Yanlu and I, and they were all wishing us well.
However, I felt that all the people down there were incomparably illusory.
Zhang Yu and Xia Bing held hands and stood at the very front. Xia Bing nodded to me. Zhang Yu was smiling.
"Miss Homi, you are willing to marry Mr. Morning Research Dew. From now on, whether in sickness or in health, you will accompany him ……"
"I'm not willing to ……" I pulled down the sari on my head as tears slid down from the corners of my eyes in big chunks.
Looking at Chen Yanlu's face, I said word by word, "I'm sorry, Chen Yanlu, I can't marry you."
When I finished saying these words, the world in front of me suddenly changed for a moment.
The crowd around us, and the world of the church, began to continuously tear and then distort.
In the end, the only ones left behind were me and Chen Yanlu.
The two of us stood in front of the bar of the bar, Chen Yanlu looked at me with a somewhat pale face.
I looked at the two glasses of wine on top of the bar. With a trembling voice, I said, "Chen Yanlu, this is all a dream, we should wake up ……"
Morning Research Lou said in a dry voice, "Why don't you want to let the dream continue?"
As soon as Chen Yanlu's words fell, the world in front of me changed again, and I was standing inside the church again, with Chen Yanlu looking closely into my eyes.
I looked at the group of people on the stage, but it was as if I saw an empty void.
I still shook my head, and then the world changed back to the bar, inside our bar.
The dim light, through the glasses, gave off a faint wave of light, reflecting on Chen Yanlu's face, incomparable depression and loneliness.
Chen Yanlu has never been by my side.
Although for so many years, we have always been together, including eating and sleeping, hiking together, going down to the sea together, all of the things, the two people almost rarely separated.
But now at this time, once I think back on it, it feels like all those things, are like a dream. Gradually disappeared in the mind.
What was becoming clearer and clearer was seven years ago, that seven-year dream.
Zhang Yu's words reverberated in my mind anew.
I said to Chen Yanlu, "Chen Yanlu, let the dream wake up."
Chen Yanlu was violently hugged to my body, tears pouring down furiously.
I picked up the wine glass and then placed it towards my lips.
This time, not subjected to any blocking power, the white liquor, entered the throat. It turned into a cool breath that burrowed into my body.
I felt as if my entire being had become much heavier. After blurring before my eyes, they cleared up again.
It was still the bar, still the same spot, I was holding an empty glass, and a woman with white hair, was quietly looking at me.
I twisted my head and looked at Morning Research Dew, who was also holding a wine glass on the side.
His body was trembling non-stop, and his eyes were tightly closed, as if they would open at any moment.
The white-haired woman's voice drifted into my ears, "If you wake up, he's going to wake up too."
I looked at her with a pale face, and in her hand, she was holding a wine bottle filled with white liquid.
Inside, all of it was fresh wine.
Zhang Yu disappeared into thin air, I looked at the white-haired woman and asked, "Where is Zhang Yu?"
The white-haired woman shook her head and said, "The wine is not drunk. This dream, only you are willing to wake up."
I looked blankly at the white-haired woman, then looked around at all the arrangements inside the bar.
Yet, it felt incomparably familiar, as if every decoration within it was set up by me.
This bar, was the bar inside my dream. New Wine Bar.
The white-haired woman handed me a small sign.
But it was picked up by a wide palm.
I looked at the teary-eyed Chen Yanlu, but Chen Yanlu looked at me with difficulty and said, "I'm sorry, I want to selfishly leave you behind."
Above this sign, the four words of business suspension were written.
After weathering, the sign above has left traces of time, as if through years of time.
The handwriting on it was incomparably familiar. I looked at the white-haired woman blankly and said, "Why?"
The white-haired woman shook her head and said, "The real and the dream world are just a split second away, and all the decision is up to you."
I shook my head and said, "I don't want that right ……"
Stumbling, I fled the bar. There was no one behind me chasing me, but I still felt like I was running away.
Fleeing to the end of the world, to the ends of the earth.
Morning Research Dew chased after me.
Running, my chest suddenly burst with nausea. I couldn't help but half-kneel on the ground and vomited violently.
Chen Yanlu caught up with me and nervously patted my back.
I coughed and cried at the same time, tears striking above the ground in large chunks.
The dream woke up, the dream should have woken up a long time ago. A dream that should have woken up from the moment I saw Morning Glory's eyes.
I was wishing extravagantly, because I didn't want Xia Bing to die, so inside my dream, there was Xia Bing.
Then Zhang Yu, was the real Zhang Yu, and Chen Yanlu, was still Chen Yanlu.
The three of us, had the same dream.
The time inside the dream was perhaps a moment of reality.
Chen Yanlu said, "Thank you for giving me seven years of good times."
I shook my head and said with difficulty, "I really almost didn't wake up, Chen Yanlu, you're so selfish."
Chen Yanlu hugged me tightly and said in an agitated voice, "Homi, will you marry me."
Another wave of dry heaves rose in me. With a dizzy brain, I fainted.
When I woke up, I found myself lying in the middle of a hospital bed. A voice came to my ears in a blur.
"You say you're a big man, your own wife is pregnant for three months don't know, and also let her not eat for so long. In case something happens you won't be able to regret it ……" It was a somewhat rambling middle-aged woman's voice.
I struggled to open my eyes, only to find that in the middle of the ward, there was only Chen Yanlu and a middle-aged female doctor.
That middle-aged woman looked at Chen Yanlu with an iron face, still counting and saying, "Now you need to be hospitalized for observation, the child's mother's body is very weak, she needs to be properly conditioned."
While she said that, she turned her head to look at me and said, "Hmm? You're awake? Well, since you're awake, I'll give you both the benefit of the doubt. When you're in your twenties, you always have to take responsibility for yourself, do you realize that you're three months pregnant?"
I was bewildered, a buzzing inside my head, and whatever she said after that was a busy signal that didn't linger for a moment in my mind.
When it was just me and Chen Yen Lu left inside the room, I looked at the ceiling blankly, thinking that this was only supposed to be a dream.
I woke up and all of it, the dream, the real dream, all of it hadn't happened.
I would be pregnant? I did have sex with Morning Research Dew when I was inside the dream. But wasn't that a dream?
I looked at Chen Yanlu with a pale face and said, "Why?"
Chen Yanlu shook her head, the blankness in her eyes, even more intense.
Hospital stayed for three days, I was done not know how many checks.
Holding a thick drop of sheets, the whole person was a blank.
Chen Yanlu said, "Homi, let's get married."
I shook my head, tears rolling down from the corners of my eyes in big drops, then said in a trembling voice, "Chen Yanlu, I don't want to see you right now."
The dream was like a complete misalignment with the real world.
The post-fifteen-year-old me, the me inside that dream, and now my memories of the past seven years were completely confused.
With great difficulty, I climbed up and pulled off the IV tube that was inserted into the back of my hand, then got up and out of bed, leaving the hospital.
Chen Yanlu followed closely behind me, I ignored him, and he was still holding a thermos box in his hand.
I knew what was inside.
It was my favorite purple summer porridge inside the dream.
I wanted to find out what the hell was going on.
After leaving the hospital, I immediately took a cab and told the driver about the street where the New Wine Bar was located.
The driver drove over according to the route I told him, but there, it was an empty lot.
Not to mention the bar, there wasn't even a house, not even a street.
The driver looked at me with a frown and said, "Girl, are you remembering wrong, this place has been empty for a long time."
I got out of the car with a pale face and looked at the empty land, all the perceptions inside my head seemed to have been knocked over.
There was another sound of brakes, and Chen Yanlu anxiously got down from the car, took a piece of clothing, and draped it over my body.
He was just about to speak, but froze at the same time.
Looking at the empty space in front of him, his expression was incredibly blank.
The street, gone.
No, it never existed.